By Sagar Raina
These days high frequency of intercaste marriages among Kashmiri Pandit community has created a tense ambiance among one section of the community and simultanously other section of the community says intercaste marriage within our community is not an issue depeding upon how sincere one is if he/she decides to go for an intercaste marriage.
In an informal interaction with Asha Trakroo, orginally a punjabi and now a Kashmir Pandit, said ,"But I am afraid ,it is useless to ponder why one should not go for out of cast marriages. If KP girls get married out of cast, I believe many out of cast girls get married to KP guys, thus keeping the balance of KP population optimum, so no question of KP communitys' extinction". She said," what I realise at the moment is to upkeep our identity by learning to speak kashmiri language and to perform all such kashmiri customs which we have been witnessing in our homes right from our childhood."
Asha Ji got married to Ravi Trakroo 27 years back and she embraced kashmiriyat to the extent that she can speak kashmiri, perform all the kashmiri customs , ceremonies like herat, pann, and even she cooks all the kashmiri food stuff like gogji, nadir, hakh, monj etc.
When asked " Do girls get adjusted to a new culture?" she replied," But obvious all the girls get adjusted to any culture subject to the condition how much support does she get from her in-laws and husband."
Definitely Asha ji is a source of inspiration for all of those who adopt Kashmiri Pandit culture.
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10 comments:
Hello,
I admire Ashaji and the way in which she embraced Kashmiriyat after her marriage to a Kashmiri Pandit.
I dont think only marrying Kashmiris witin Kashmiris is going to save Kashmiri Pandit community from extinction.
We need to practice Kashmiri customs, speak Kashmiri language and wear our identities as Kashmiris with pride for our community to thrive.
Marriages are made in heaven and solemnized on earth. You should marry a person only when you are sure of him or her as your life partner.
No caste, creed or religion should be a wall in between.
Nevertheless, keeping a community alive is not subjective to a single factor like marriage. It is more important to make the younger generation aware of what it means to be a Kashmiri Pandit.
This is really amazing that a punjabi girl got married to a KP and then she not only embraced Kashmiri religion and performed all rituals but she also became well conversant in preparing Kashmiri foods.
My point is how many girls from other religions will come forward to marry kPs. Asha ji is an exception, but it cannot happen always. We will have to save our culture and religion by devising other methods. Let us come together and think over it.
Alka Razdan
Bettr idea for KPs now z to allow their sons to get married to the gals of other castes but nevr evr allow KP gals to marry outside our community. This z d only way to save our community from extinction......
Suresh wangnoo
Really amazing !!! the other day i wanted to marry a gal from punjab but my parents flatly refused this kinda relation....I mean out of KP castism...we both were in love with each other but bowing to my parents wishes I had to say "NO" to my beloved....
I just cant do anything but to convey my humble respects to Asha ji who, even being a female, grappled with circumstances and made her as well as her hubby's parents bow to their pious love.....several salutes to her...
I am a KP guy...I couldnt marry a gal of my choice coz my parents didnt all me to go out of caste....I feel I am a coward...
Several salutes to Asha Ji.....
I am a KP guy...I couldnt marry a gal of my choice coz my parents didnt all me to go out of caste....I feel I am a coward...
Several salutes to Asha Ji.....
Thanks for sending comments. I'am really thankful to Sagar Ji who has published an article over the issue of inter caste marriages especially in my context. In fact a child, when born, does not have any religion. Its we who teach and preach him as to which religion/caste he belongs. I firmly believe that where-ever we get married we must devote ourselves to the circumstances prevailing there so as to give and receive full love and support. Human is, after-all human and he/she does not have any caste....
Well, said" Human is, after-all human and he/she does not have any caste...." but when are we going to realize this? I am sorry to say, many of the comments say that they cant marry a girl of their choice and have to be submissive to their parents stating their cowardliness, this is not a cowardliness but a mind set which is illiterate and cannot expand to literacy ever and ever. i feel pity on their understanding and mental growth.
Jaspreet, in other words we call 'min-set' as the values which one inherits from his or her family. In most of KP families kids learn conservative traditions which were set by our forefathers centuries ago according to social structure of their time. Though there is a drastic change in society but there seems no change in the mind set of these families. They do not appear to shun centuries old traditions and prefer to remain cling them with their chest like a dead monkey infant. This is a real TRAGEDY.
Jaspreet, this is a real Tragedy that KP youth is enmeshed in century old conservative traditions to which you call 'mind-set'. Irony of fate is that some KP families still prefer to cling those empty traditions on their chest like a dead monkey infant and pass these on to their kids. This is a TRAGEDY, I must confess.
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